Stranger, Danger!

Book of Face: Ch.9, Verses 19-23

 

“Thou Shall Not Talk to Strangers.”

 

You remember when you were younger and your parents (or teachers, or authority figures in general) told you “Don’t talk to strangers!”

What a great concept that was.

 

I mean we all know how dangerous a stranger can be. We’ve seen the movies. Young people talk to stranger, stranger turns out to be deranged serial killer, locks them up and torments them in twisted ways (like sewing them together). Pretty much every stranger we come across is most likely to be a murder/rapist/sociopath/weirdo/thief/ or all around degenerate. Be careful!

Sure that little-old-lady at the bus stop seems harmless enough, but you haven’t seen the meat hooks she has hanging in her garage, or the mutilated bodies under her back porch (her house must have at least a 1000 corpses in it). Watch out!

 

It’s a widely known fact that the act of talking to someone is an act of consent to torture (See The People v Strangers, 48 SCR). Don’t talk to them! It’s far too dangerous.

Imagine how peaceful the world would be if no one ever talked to a stranger. No crime, peace on earth (of course there would also be no commerce, or communication in general).

 

I mean when you get right down to it, everyone is a stranger (oh my god!).

 

Think of the day you were born (if you can remember). Imagine swimming about in that swimming pool we call the womb, not a stranger in sight.

Then suddenly, a light! Ooo that looks interesting, let’s check it out. And “pop!” you are born. “Hey who the heck are these people?” Some red faced woman with her feet in the air, and some dude next to her holding her hand…

Stranger Danger!

Whatever you do, Don’t talk to them!

Strangers are dangerous, they’re probably planning on turning me into some sort of “baby centipede” (dibs on front!). Just keep your mouth shut and everything will be alright (well kind of).

 

Think back on the rest of your life, all those strangers you came across. Yeah you know, now you call them “friends.”

 

See if we had never talked to strangers, we’d have never talked to anyone… ever.

So maybe next time you cross paths with a stranger forget that whole mutilating psychopath persona that we paint all strangers with and think of how every person in your life, every single one – every friend, every lover, every mother, every child – was once a stranger. A very dangerous stranger.

 

So be dangerous,

Talk to a stranger.

 

Namaste.

 

 

 

“Always give a word or sign of salute when meeting or passing a friend, or even a stranger, if in a lonely place.”

– Tecumseh

 

“Tomorrow, smile at a perfect stranger and mean it.”

– John O’Callaghan

 

 

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